Mr. Gay Maryland United States At-Large isn’t what you think. As always, gay men come up with the best witticisms. “At-Large” in this case means over 200 lbs!
Anyhow, I was lucky enough to be present at the crowning of Derek Skye Villaverde, 2021’s Mr. Gay Maryland United States At-Large. Both of our lives changed that day.
But first, about Derek. He’s tall, kind, genial, and when he has a mic in his hand, you can’t take your eyes off him. I talked to him about his crowning and what being involved in the national pageant system meant to him backstage after the ceremony.
Mother’s, Can You Hear Me?
Well, “Papa” in the words of “Papa, Can You Hear Me?,” the song from Barbra Streisand’s 1983 classic, “Yentl”. But kind of the same thing. The Mr. Gay Maryland United States At-Large festivities took place at Mother’s Federal Hill Grille in Baltimore!
Derek lip-synced to “You Raise Me Up” by Josh Groban. His lip-synching was so good I thought he was singing live! Groban’s a ballad that’s touching enough as it is. But when Derek looked up at the ceiling and mouthed, “Thanks, Mom,” he cried, I cried, and so did many others. He clasped his hands and shook them, all the while still looking up at his mother’s heavenly home.
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Mother’s has a section where drag performances, including the weekly Drag-ulous Brunch and Show . he bar is on the right when you enter the section where the drag performances are held, there are seating booths on the left, and in the middle are tables. Around the tables is empty space, which I would soon discover was a runway for the drag performers to come. One of those performers was Dustyn Dawn. He did a rendition of “Welcome to the Jungle” in a green, black, and silver reptile-print leotard, among other songs. His makeup matched his leotard, which accentuated his curvy body and undulating dance moves, eliciting many-a-tip held out for him by patrons.
Several other drag performers worked the catwalk that day, and I got so into their sensational makeup, costumes, and performances, I was hooting, hollering, and even dancing. I was hoarse by the time I interviewed Derek! For me, it was a throwback to the fall of 1999. After a particularly difficult, dire period from which I barely escaped with my life, I began going out to the gay bars and clubs in Baltimore and found both myself and my LGBTQ+ community. By that time, everyone in my life accepted me as I identified then: non-binary (a gay man and a woman). But I found it’s a totally different thing to be accepted by people who are wonderful but different from you than it is to be among your people.
Derek was officially crowned by Felix “Big Fee” Correa Mr. Gay United States At-Large 2021 and Jackson B. Nite, Mr. Gay United States 2020.
That day, when a queen/king was done performing, he/she/they took turns emceeing the show. When Dustyn was done I asked her why she thought the United States Gay Pageantry System (USGPS) was important.
“Because we are underrepresented in pop culture and this is a way of pushing ourselves into mainstream culture,” she said.
And: What we remember and forget about our lives.
A Lotties of Hotties
When I went backstage to talk to Derek about his involvement in the USGPS, over the fun distraction of lots of hotties changing into street clothes and shooting the breeze, we chatted.
“My title is Mr. Gay Maryland United States At-Large 20 21. And I’ve had the title since today,” he said when I asked him to confirm it.
Before coming to Maryland, Derek grew up in Galix, Virginia. He completed two years of college after attending a public high school there. Now he’s a Certified Medical Assistant and phlebotomist “by day”, as he put it, “And in the evening I’m a male lead entertainer.”
The Personal Is Political
There’s debate now over who coined this defining second-wave feminist slogan. But whoever did, it meant and still means that our personal lives are where big, social issues play out.
When I asked him how he got involved in the gay pageantry system, Derek said his friend, Jackson B. Night, talked him into it. Jackson is Mr. Gay United States 2020 and performed that day at Mother’s too. He sent up the house with a rendition of “I Want It That Way” by the Backstreet Boys in a white pleather outfit. It’s not often you see a drag interpretation of a mid-tempo lovey-dovey ballad by a boy band, but Jackson made it irresistible.
Derek said that when Jackson was running for his 2020 title, he convinced Derek to try out for the At-Large Maryland division.
“And I ran with it,” Derek said.
I got the impression that Derek relies on the support of his family and friends a lot. For example, Derek and his husband, David Patterson, have been together for 16 years and legally married for three more. “No children. No pets. Just each other,” he said with an impish grin.
Platforms and Payments
I asked Derek what his platform was as Mr. Gay Maryland United States At-Large 2021. First, he pointed out, the founder of the Gay Pageantry System, JP Gulla sees community service as part of the point of the crowns, and titles, and sashes, and singing and dancing. And so does Derek.
“I want to continue educating people not just about the LGBT community, but volunteering with the Trevor Project and Habitat for Humanity,” he said. He also said he wanted to support people trying to break into entertainment through the gay pageantry system. “Some people are afraid to try out for the pageants because they don’t think they’re not good enough or won’t be accepted.”
Derek’s voice got deeper and he looked me straight in the eyes. “My mission is: Always. Be. You.”
He told me he wants to “pay it forward”. Just as Jackson gave him the push he needed to try out for Mr. Gay Maryland United Statees At-Large, he wants to support others. I asked Derek what he’d do with $10,000 if he had to use it for USGPS. He said he’d give it to someone who wants to try out for a pageant but may not be able to afford it. Now, that’s what I call paying it forward!
When I’m Down
Just before he was crowned Mr. Gay Maryland United States At-Large, Derek sang a song live: Josh Groban’s rendition of “You Raise Me Up.” He dedicated it to his mother and cried as he looked up the ceiling. I couldn’t hold it back, and I cried too.
Derek had said to me that the best part about the pageantry system was being part of a family. And your family raises you up when you’re down, for sure. That was part of the magic of finding my LGBTQ+ community, too. I already had beautiful, wonderful relationships when I found my LGBTQ+ community for the first time back in 1999. But there’s a way in which only your own people–however you identify–can be there for you. As much as I loved my LGBTQ+ community and how it had helped me find myself, life intervened, and as happens even within good friendships sometimes, my people and I drifted apart.
That day at Mother’s I felt like I had begun to find them again. I felt that unmistakable, electric wholeness that I used to feel when I’d go out to meet my friends in Boys Town in Baltimore in the early Aughts. For the first time ever, I felt like I was me, un-self-consciously, in the moment, and just living and loving life. I’d go out dancing for hours, taking breaks for a club soda with no ice, my signature drink (I was sober), come home to eat a cheese sandwich and cheesecake while watching VHS tapes of The Golden Girls reruns. I was completing my undergrad education in English and journalism, and the classroom, learning about rhetoric and the 5 Ws and an H, was another place I felt totally whole and happy.
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Derek said the biggest reward for him as a result of his involvement in the USGPS was knowing he was a part of a family for life. And that was what was so powerfully positive for me about finding my LGBTQ+ community back in 1999.
Another “greatest reward” of the day, he said, was having his family and friends there.
“I didn’t know how much positivity I’d find being a part of the pageant system,” Derek said. And I didn’t when I became part of the Baltimore LGBTQ+ community either! It was deeply healing for me then. And it hopefully will be again, as I reintegrate into the community now.
“We’ve got something incredible going,” JP Gulla, owner of the USGPS system said to me. He sang a live song. I’m telling you–this guy can melt hearts when he sings. I was about to take my bra off and throw it at him–but then, you know, I’d be bra-less.
Despite J.P.’s live performance, as Derek reminded me: “All the performers are drag performers because there are different types of drag from male to female to queens. All drag is valid”
Mother’s has a monthly drag show–Absolutely Dragulous–co-Owned by Derek and Dustyn. I highly recommend you check it out.
J.P’s Words Struck a Chord
When J.P. said that the USGPS had something incredible going, it stuck with me. It’s not just the fun of seeing drag performances
It’s that the USGPS is a family, as Derek said. Even though the LGBTQ+ community is expert at creating non-blood-related families, because we’ve had to because many of our famiies (not mine, thankfully), have rejected us. I’d say too that creating a family within a family is pretty incredible, in J.P.’s words.
I’m grateful for your readership! Check back with me each week here at politicalpoetrypastiche as my linguistic, literary, and generally loquacious involvement in local politics takes on a mélange of prose and poetry genres. After all: All Politics Is HoCo-al™. Join me on Facebook here, find me on Twitter at @politicalpoetr3, and follow me on Instagram using the handle @politicalpoetrypastiche.